Never when it counts

I auditioned to play with the local community orchestra today. I was really nervous, but felt quite prepared, in spite of never having played my piece straight through with no stopping in front of observers. I played the first movement of Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No. 4 in G minor. My teacher came with me and played the orchestral reduction accompaniment. He plays so beautifully. I always have to remind myself how lucky I am to be playing with him when I'm in the midst of a run-through. Although, I must admit, I think I am a more sensitive collaborator than he is (lol). Anyway, it was just the three of us in the room, me, my teacher, and the conductor. It went pretty well. I had one tiny fudge/pause but didn't stop outright, and was able to keep going and finish the piece. I played it better than I have ever played in front of an audience. He said he'd make his decision in mid-June. Then I came home and played it for a friend who stopped by (non-musician), and I kept thinking, "This is stupid; it would have been much more helpful to have played for her yesterday; this doesn't even count, since my audition is over." Wouldn't you know? I played it PERFECTLY that time. Not a single pause. Straight through with not a single hiccup. So here's the million dollar question: Why can't I ever play perfectly when it counts? Why, when it counts the most, can't I pull myself together?

I got to thinking that I started having these memory lapses when I was in high school and college. That was about the time that I started trying to follow my teachers' advice about learning music in small sections, rather than playing straight through again and again. Well, I had the brilliant idea that perhaps to play straight through again and again might be the missing link in my practicing. Maybe what I need is the complete train of thought. Maybe with my next piece, after I practice the thing in sections rehearsing each detail, I should demand that I play it straight through 5 times each day, with or without the music. I think it's worth a try. I think I'd have less memory trouble. I'm going to do it.

Earth Day

Today is Earth Day. I drove my SUV to school. LOL. I do love our earth, I really do, but I had to drive the carpool this morning, so SUV it was. Yesterday I came home to find 3 of my perennials (purple desert loving verbena) yanked out of the ground. It seems my gardener had not been informed that there were actual weeds in the yard (dandelions and morning glory) that needed pulling. On the plus side, my tulips look gorgeous. They are lucky they do not remotely resemble any indigenous weeds. The up side to having a gardener like mine is that he cooks the wonderful things we grow into delicious gourmet meals. I wouldn't trade him for the world.

Today I played my Rachmaninoff Concerto No. 4 for concert class. I lost my place and had another memory lapse (OF COURSE), but otherwise played really well. I think I made some beautiful music. The audience clapped and whooped for me. I think they enjoyed it. I hope the day will come soon that I will be able to play ANYTHING at all without forgetting. So far, I forget, so maybe I qualify as a very good intermediate pianist. I don't feel quite like a "Master" yet. I always feel like I just had a heart attack after I play by memory. Tonight I'm going to play 2 pieces for my "Piano Club:" Granados' El Pelele, and Haydn's Eb Sonata III. Presto. I think it'll go well.

I had the greatest experience with one of my piano students today. He is playing a piece called "With A Yo-Ho-Ho!" His rhythm was iffy on one part, so we made up some words for it so he could more easily remember the rhythm. Here are our lyrics: "Here's a pirate song for a very cool dude; will you please give me some food?" Other lyrics in the rest of the piece were, "Now you'll walk the plank. You're a very stupid guy. You will drown and die," or my favorite, "If you don't say the roots you will walk the plank." It went on and on and we laughed and laughed. We practiced the piece over and over while we made up gory lyrics. I think maybe now he'll finally get it. I really enjoy teaching. I cannot WAIT for this semester to end.

Back to the Bench

Well, it didn't go as well as I hoped, but that said, I did play beautifully. My nerves got the better of me and I had a little memory slip. Whatever. I didn't get chosen, but I don't feel really bad about it. I'll still have other opportunities. I just think I need to have more performing experience. I think if I can perform it again several times, I'll do just fine. I really am quite new back to this memorization bit. My goal is to play it 7 times WELL with my teacher, and then 7 times WELL in front of people, and then I'll go play for the conductor of the orchestra I'd like to play for. That would make for a successful experience.

I had several friends come to hear me, and they all were very complimentary and enthusiastic about my playing. I have some of the best friends ever. I'm a pretty lucky girl, to have all this support and encouragement.

Now I'm choosing repertoire. There are seven Toccatas by J.S. Bach, and I want to choose one of those to learn over the summer, along with several of the Goyescas by Granados, and a Chopin Etude. Which are your favorites? Send me a youtube link!